끝났어?

So this is it, eh? After months and months of trying to run away from me, trying to hide from me, you are just going to leave it all behind, and start a new life?
Do you even CARE about how I feel. I try to talk to you, I tried so hard. Do you care? No. You think I’m trying to be the contagious guy that I was before, but no. I am just trying to have a conversation with you. I want to start everything over. I want to apologize. but do you care? No
So, what are you gonna do? Make a new account and avoid me? Yea, you know, that sounds legitimately fine with me, except it HURTS ME. I am the only one in the WORLD that you hate, isn’t it. Oh sure, it’s not your fault that you hate me, but at least listen to me. Show me some respect, will you?

I sound desperate? I am desperate. I am an idiot who can’t forget the past, and you are a happy girl that takes everything and walks away. We’re over? As long as you’re alive, I love you. But when you read this, you probably would Not care. Psh, what am I thinking; why on earth would you read this?

I will keep on waiting.

This isn’t over.

You can’t just walk away like that.

SHINee–’Sherlock’ Japanese Version Lyrics// Shinee– ‘Sherlock’ 日本語歌詞

SHINee is Back(SHINee is Back)
SHINee is Back(SHINee is Back)
SHINee is Back(SHINee is Back)
(Back Back Back Back)

直感したAll Stop! 君はきっと知ってる
斬新なTrickを読み解く本当のカギ
始めようか　Mystery
Sherlock気取って　追いつめてく　Oh

It’s you　些細なhintも見逃さない
狙っているんだろ？　Treasure in my mind.
It’s you　不安なその眼がたまらない
隠さないで　ちゃんと見せてごらん？　Freeze!

真実が明かされるまでは
後には引けないルール
Black or White
火花散らす　何度だって

Oh I’m so Curious yeah
探してた　ずっと君だけ　yeah Oh
I’m so Curious Yeah
I’m so Curious Yeah

Hide　and　seek　しよう girl
さあ　答えて I’m in doubt
企んでる気分はどう girl
ねぇ　聞かせて I’m in doubt

逃げないで
これからさ お楽しみは
分かるんだろ？

Oh I’m so Curious yeah
探してた　きっと君だって　yeah Oh
I’m so Curious Yeah(SHINee！)
I’m so Curious Yeah(SHINee！)

もしかしたら全部リアルな夢
目の前の君の姿も
What’s the truth? 確かめられない
Where’s the truth? 苦しい　Fade Out

you don’t say baby
Sherlockは君の方なのか？
もうまさか　このままじゃ
終われない　終わらない

犯人探しの妄想　僕ら以外はno more
立ち入り禁止　sorry!
不可能だって逃亡　消去しないで証拠
ここから Make a story!
(何度だって!)

Oh I’m so Curious yeah
探してた　ずっと君だけ　yeah Oh
I’m so Curious Yeah
I’m so Curious Yeah

Tonight, SHINee’s in the house (Ho Ho!)
So give it up, give it up, give it up, for SHINee~
Give it up, give it up, give it up, for SHINee~

Who can I count on.

Never felt so depressed before. Never. There was always someone that I could count on.

They say, life is yours, you are in total control of it; when nobody is there for you, you can’t look down to yourself, instead, you have to cheer yourself up, because when you don’t stand up for yourself, nobody will. People believed that too much. People don’t care about their friends anymore. Being popular, being themselves, and not caring about other’s opinions. Because yea, you only live once.

Does being yourself mean not caring about your friends? If you live life according to your plan, at least be there for someone who you counted on. If you think everything you say is right, well I’m here to tell you, no. It’s right to yourself, since your brain told you to do it, but you know, the world does not revolve around you. There are other people as well. Nobody cares about your stupid opinions, if you’re not going to care about theirs.

A friendship is a two way thing, if you can’t do your part, then I’m sorry, but someone is going to leave you.

In this world, living is hard enough. Finding someone to be there for you is even harder. Loneliness just overflows. People fight you down, and then they help you stand up. Do you think that I really will accept your hospitality? You are the one that got me down on the ground. Do you think I can ever trust you again?

People are too fake. Sometimes, you don’t even know if they are real, or faking to be real.

You always wanted to hear the truth; if I tell you the truth, you’re mad. If I tell you a lie, you’re mad as well. What do you want me to do?

Whatever happened, happened already. It does not mean that you should just forget about it, it means you learn from it.

Life is conflicting. If we do everything as if today was the last day, we will never know where we’re going, we’re just blindly walking; if we do everything as if life never ends, we can’t see where we are right now; we’ll fall and trip. People say that they want the truth, but they get mad after hearing the truth. People say you should stop pleasing people, but when you listen to yourself, they hate you for being headstrong. People hate the way you are, but they miss you when you are gone. People say you should forget what happened before, and learn from it. See, this post is conflicting already.

My point is, who will be there?
As we go on, we’ll find more people, and this is just a short struggle.
But why? Why do we have to go through this? Isn’t there always someone whom we can count on?
No, unless you find someone.
Isn’t that what we all did? Isn’t that what, so called ‘friends’, are supposed to do?
No, some are fake, some are real.
How would you know who is fake, and who is real?
If you can’t tell them apart, it’s your fault.
How? They are quite the same these days

I just.. don’t want to be here anymore. People are using me. Am I even a friend to them?

I seriously… need someone to count on. Simple enough, but it’s hard to find someone these days that can do the job.

Untitled. True story.

When a girl and a boy are together, and another girl comes in,

The girl does EVERYTHING to tell the boy that the other girl is fake, and he should stay with her.

Whilst when another boy comes in,

IT’S WAR.

Don’t you miss..

Don’t you miss those times,
When smiles were just smiles,
When we passed notes, instead of blackmail,
When we lifted each other up, not step on their tails,
When we actually tried to unite, and not cause chaos?
Those times,
When you did something because you wanted,
When there was no drama, and you weren’t exhausted,

When life was simple as
‘speaking out what you have to say,
Secrets are meant to be kept, not to give away,
Love was not that big a deal, it’ll happen later
In our lives. ‘

The times
when someone likes someone, they tell each other
There was nobody in the middle, acting like your brother
Or sister, claiming they are trying to help you get him faster
In the end, they screw you up and leave you behind after
All the mess they made.

The times
When friends were all real, and were not jealous
When you get a new friend, instead they made you feel precious
When two best friends won’t fight over a guy or some other stupid
Arguments, and break up their friendship, with people screaming ‘do it!’

The times
When something is broken, we fix it, not throw it away
When we love someone long time, not for just one day
When we see what was important, when everything was in its place
When friends are close to you, they’ll help you tie your laces
In the rain.

Whatever happened to us?
We are a complete mess, inside out.
Misunderstanding, full of doubt
When trust, friendship, even love
Means nothing compared to popularity?

People are fighting over useless things that won’t even matter,
They have no idea, they keep on going,
Cheating, fighting, lies get fatter,
Living a life with no meaning.

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO US?
Why can’t we recreate a smile, without trying to hurt?
Why can’t we stop and rewind, and see what’s wrong?
Why can’t we stop lying, and let our ambitions burst?
Why can’t someone ring a bell, ‘DING DONG DING DONG’?
Why does popularity decides who is up first?
Why are you guys kissing already, cheek, and tongue?
Why won’t we just be ourselves, and fill up our thirst?
Why can’t we just chill our and rap, like MC MONG? (that’s a bad line lol)

Seriously guys, stop and rewind. Things are going crazy. Chill out.

Random Stuff

This is really stupid…
You know, I just can’t help myself looking at your profile..
I know, yes I do hate you, I mean
Why wouldn’t I? I don’t know how, but you broke us apart, and somehow ran away with it
We are supposed to not be friends at this point
But I miss you
I truly do…
I hate you…
Get lost

…

2NE1 ‘I Don’t Care’ Japanese Lyrics/2NE1 ‘I Don’t Care’ 日本語歌詞

hey playboy
its about time
and your time’s up
I had to do this one for my girls you know
sometimes you gotta act like you don’t care
that’s the only way you boys learn

oh…. oh oh oh oh oh 2NE1
oh…. oh oh oh oh oh 2NE1

まだ　留守電午前二時　返事のないメール
今　何してるの　誰かといるの
不安になる　わかり？　oh oh oh

ほら　退屈そんな　その態度
私の話　ねぇ　聞いてるの？
君の視線に　いつも　ため息
魅力できなごだし　oh oh oh

声聞きたくて　何度も　携帯チェックして
ホットカレーで　作いよ〜　ねぇ、本当！

I don’t care 今だけ　
私を必要としないで　よ口説いているだけ
今更 やさしくし ないで
‘Cause I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
‘Cause I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
Boy I don’t care

約束したでもつばかり面らくもないまま
一人で居る時　側の楽しい　会話にしっとして
酔えば優しい声で電話して　会いたいなんて女子　
といつでも側に居る私なら　すごいよかったでしょう

何度許しだって ほら　君は変わらないわ
この恋に私からさよなら oh~ oh~

I don’t care 今だけ　
私を必要としないで　よすな　俺痛いだけ
もう私に我慢をないで
‘Cause I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
‘Cause I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
Boy I don’t care

泣きよ出した夜を忘れないよ boy
もっと後悔シャッターと　もっと生成するよ boy
離れたくないけどつ記憶しない　大事にしなかったのに今更なに

富まされてあげ単打よ馬鹿
今日から男　女が迫るbad girl
涙さえもなく　笑い長そう
愛のゲームのloser
食い改めでい街 oh
目の前から消えてよ

Now clap your hands to this

I don’t care 今だけ　
私を必要としないで　よ口説いているだけ
今更 やさしくし ないで

You know I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
You know I just don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
I don’t care eh eh eh eh eh
Boy I don’t care

Thoughts on iOS 5.1, iPhoto, the New iPad, and recent updates

So.. I’m sorry I haven’t updated this blog recently, I was kinda busy.. there’s too much stuff to be done

Anyways,
iOS 5.1 came out 2 weeks ago on a Wednesday, and to be honest, the only reason I updated is because I wanted to try out the updated Apple apps(iMovie, iPhoto, GarageBand) and the Japanese Siri; I knew I would lose my jailbreak, but hey, there’s always gonna be someone that’s working on the current version jailbreak (@Pod2g, hint hint), so yea..
Well, Japanese Siri didn’t work out the first few days; apparently the server was overloaded. But when it works, it’s awesome– it can understand pretty much everything I say to it(even though my Japanese is not that great.. loll). Names are a big problem– I have a friend here called ‘Akhil Veeraghanta’, and I SERIOUSLY don’t know how to pronounce it in Japanese— like.. アクヒル? I tried all possible ways, but none worked… sigh. Still, overall, it’s working fine. I like the new iPad camera UI, the shutter button is always on the right. They sorta fixed it in iOS 5.0, by making the button rotate but keeping the screen locked. Battery performance completely improved on the iPhone 4S; Usually I need to charge it 2 times a day(800AM-320PM, then 320PM-1100PM), but now when I come home from school I still get a decent 50%. Amazing.

Right, iPhoto. It’s literally THE best photo app I’ve ever seen on iOS, totally worth your 5 bucks. Journals are awesome, the enhancing features are easy and intuitive, I have to say it’s actually better than the Mac(or at least My Mac) since it’s much faster. Here’s a journal I made in about 5 minutes: https://www.icloud.com/journal/#p=01&t=CAEQARoQY9L5WNnJKUtSf0kw_4sJrQ==&f=/82J93X7T25~com~apple~mobileiphoto/Public/0D0A2D9E-6CE2-487C-9F78-92DA79040E02.jb/index.json
It’s about food~

The new iPad. No, it doesn’t suck, it’s still an awesome tablet. All I’m saying is that it’s not worth upgrading.
Retina Display; You really can’t notice the difference between the iPad 2 display and the new iPad’s Retina Display, since the screen is so large(it’s not like the iPhone 3GS and the iPhone 4, the screen is only 3.5 inch–the iPad has a 9.7 inch screen, seeing the details between one pixel and 4 pixels is quite hard, unless you use like a microscope or something.
A5X; When I went to the Apple store, the guys there ‘advertised’ it as a ‘quad-core chip’– False Advertisement! it’s a Dual-Core chip with Quad-Core Graphics(which means, there are 4 cores in the graphic card, and 2 cores in the normal GPU). It’s not like the Eeepad which has 4 cores and an 8MP camera and is cheaper!! Wait I’m off topic… lol
5MP Camera; Great upgrade, since the freaking camera on the iPad 2 is like made out of potato, only 0.7MP. 1080P video support, which is awesome~ um.. still no flash(or Flash, get it?), but a leap forward.
LTE. 4GLTE. $25/Month. And only in North America. Though 3G still works. But considering you got an iPad, you probably have a smartphone, and tethering… yea. Not as fast as LTE, but saves you more than 6 boxes of sushi. You decide.

Updates on life.. Sigh. Reallly want to go back to Shanghai.. Living here is basically like living a robotic life, everything is the exact same everyday–waking up, breakfast, school, dismissal, shower, internet, nap, dinner, homework, sleep– then waking up again.
Besides, I’ve promised Sally..
And is wordpress blocked in China?
Sadly, I might not be able to write another like 1000 word poem again, since there’s nothing to write about here.. Everything is just… screwed up..

Changes That We Can’t Change

Everyone knows how sad that one sentence can be; ‘You’ve changed’. No matter how you’ve changed–either matured, childished, Fatter, Taller, rude, mean, self-centered, or any other kind of changes–it’ll make you sad; you’re not you anymore. You’ve became someone else.

‘People can’t be changed, only what’s around them can change them. ‘ No– people changes. Everyday. Everyone. If you don’t notice, that means you’ve been very close with them, noticing their changes everyday, so that it won’t be such a big change all of a sudden, they are eventually changing, day by day. You just don’t suddenly notice/realize it.
For example–in 1 year, he grew 10CM; he grew 0.83cm/month, which comes to 0.027cm per day. Now, which change is easier for you to notice, 0.027cm/day, or 10cm/year? Obviously, 10cm/year. The same thing with personality; if one day, you talk to someone you haven’t talked to for a year, it’s more easier to notice his change than if you were to talk to him everyday.

What changes people? We change ourselves. Everyday, million and million of dead cells fall off our bodies, and new cells gets generated. After a calculation, 7 years later, you’re a completely new person.

When people are moved to new places, they need to get used there. The only way to get used to that new place, is to be involved; the only way to be involved, is to become one of the people there. It’s hard, but hanging out with them everyday will change your personality.

How should we face our own changes? We should accept it. Come to think about it, who won’t accept the new you? If your friends are really your friends, they will accept you, if you are still you. We shouldn’t feel down just because we felt we changed. Though, don’t change into a completely new person; be who You are, because everyone else is taken. Don’t be afraid of showing yourself to the world. You are you, and you are always awesome. You might be afraid that your old friends won’t accept your changes, but come to think about it, they’ve changed as well. So just do your best being your new self!

For you…

I haven’t written anything for quite a while…

Well… It’s been almost one year…
So… This is Christmas…
We’ve been though so much…
It’s so sad we had to end,
I felt so touched…
I remembered when we first hung out,
I don’t know if it was love, but it felt new
Now everyday I remember our first time meeting
I still miss you….
How much longer do you want me to hurt
How much can I take, until I cry and burst?
You are so beautiful, one in a million,
To keep you, I’d give sushi for a trillion
Saying all of those is too late already
You already belong in somebody
else’s arms…

All the good times we had together,
In class, on the phone, online, it doesn’t matter
I talked to you at any time, in the day or late at night,
From the sun sets until it rises.
You are so cute, so pretty, so beautiful…. I was so dumb
Thinking and listening to opinions of them.
I never loved someone as much I loved you,
But people told me that it’s best to break up, and tell you that we’re through.
It broke my heart…. I totally regret
From all the crazy stuff that I’ve said.
We went through one semester of almost zero talking,
The only times I see you is when you’re walking.
Everytime I see you, I can’t help but stare,
Thinking that you might still come back to me, thinking that you still care.
It’s all my fault, for not telling you how I really felt,
But to let myself slowly die, let my heart melt.
I know how I am not attractive, handsome, or cute,
But the only person I cared about is you…
The last semester, I was such an idiot,
Cared so much about stuff that isn’t even important.
When I could have been trying to tell you how I feel,
How much I care, and how much missing you kills.
I got what I wanted for a while instead of what I wanted forever,
Now the chances of us being together? Never….

I made so much mistakes with you..
We were never together before we were through..
To tell you the truth, last Christmas I was at the mall,
I imagined today happening…
And my heart hurted…
You deserve a much better person then me…
Someone who is much nicer, who looks good with you..

So today, I realized again, or finally realized…
After all that we have been through…
Loving you is something I would never stop…
Lying is something I won’t ever do…
Yes, I miss you a lot…

I love you…

Like right now,
Other then writing another post, another poem, with
Very less things to say,
Especially most stuff sounds cliché…

Yet, all my feelings are in it… Just three words…
Other then that, there is nothing to say… Nothing to
Utter…

For all my time I’ve been here,
Only you are the one that I still wish we were together…
Remember all the food times we had..?
Everyday, everything, I still remember… There’s a
Very little chance that you’ll come back to me…
Especially when we’re so far away…
Right…?
.
.
.

We haven’t talked for so long…
Heck long time…
Yet you’re still in my heart…

Do you miss me…?
I don’t know if you even care about me…
Do you really…?

Why…
Ever…

Blue skies in Vancouver…. Remember when we first met…?
Remember how blue the sky was..?
Ever, by any chance, you forgot… You never loved me…
And that day was too long ago…when your profile pictures were still
Kittens…

Under any chance,
Please remember me…

.
.
.

So, this is Christmas..
All the pain…
Love is no where…
Love is gone, it’s with you in Shanghai…
You don’t even care….
.
.
.

널 사랑해.
너를 잊지 못해….
영원 못해…
제발… 들어와..
미안해… 너..무…미안합니다…
전부 는 내가 잘못했어 때문애…
슬픈 의 기억…